29-02-2016.

Dear Love,

Do you know the movie titled.. Groundhog Day?

I bet you don’t know that movie.
You once said to me that you are not actually a movie lover.
You can’t sit tight in front of TV doing nothing but watching movie.
It’s an old movie, 1993, to be exact.
It’s a fantasy comedy drama movie, I watched it once, it was really good.
Yes, you can Google it if you want to right now.
But in case you are too lazy to Google it and read the description,
Let me just write it here.

So it’s a story about a weatherman that sent to cover a story about the annual Groundhog Day festivities; it was his fourth year, and he just did not like his assignment or the town he’s covering at.
He didn’t put any effort to hide his frustration and grudgingly gave his report on the festivities, and when he’s done, he tried to go back home but a blizzard shuts down all travel in and out of the town.
He and his team were forced to return to the town and stay another night.

Now here, is the interesting part.

The weatherman was stuck on the very same day where he had to cover the story.
So he woke up only to find that he was re-living the day (2nd February, if you want to know) over, and over again.
The day played out exactly as it did before with no one but he aware of the loop.
He tried everything – even killing himself – but he always woke up on the same day.
According to the fan website, he was stuck for more than 30 years on the same day.

So what does that information has to do with me, or you, or us?
Let me tell you another story, this time, it’s my story.

I was brushing my teeth this morning.
I was in a hurry, it was around 10:30, and I was kind of late to go to office.
I took my cousin’s toothpaste.
And I stopped brushing my teeth after 4 seconds; why, you ask?

Because it was the very same toothpaste that I used when I was there that night. And by that night, I mean my very first night that I spent with you.

I actually almost cried.
Just because of one stupid thing – a goddamn toothpaste – and it reminds me of you.
It made me remember things:

I still remember how happy we were that day.
I remember woke up and said to you via Skype that I was about to go to airport.
I remember waiting at the airport, filled with impatience and happiness.

The first blow was when I saw you at the airport.

Honestly? I didn’t know that you were that small.
I remember hugging you and kissed your hair.
And I remember that I continued to do so when we were at the train.

The second blow was when I heard you said,
“Don’t ask; if you want to kiss me, then just do it.”

The third – and the most beautiful – killing blow was when I kissed you.

It was as if nothing in the world matters.
Nothing – nothing but us;
Really, I didn’t give a flying fuck about whoever or whatever it is in this world.
All that mattered at that time was you, me, and our togetherness.
Love, I can’t describe that moment, but trust me, it was one of the most beautiful moment that we have; just admit it.

And I remember how we spent the whole day going here and there together.
And I remember that I was brushing my teeth with your toothpaste.
But that was NOT the reason why I almost cried this morning.

It was because I remember that I kissed you goodnight, and you have the very same toothpaste taste lingering on your beautiful lips.

If the third killing blow left me dying, I guess that goodnight kiss really killed me.

Remembering all those, now I really wish I was the weatherman in the Groundhog Day.
Or I should say, I wish the Universe cursed me to repeat the very same day where we first met; where we first kissed; where we first had lunch and dinner together; and where I first kissed you goodnight and spent our night together.
I would be willing to repeat that very same day for as long as the Universe want to.
Call me the biggest idiot in the entire world, but I won’t be bored to see your smile, I won’t be bored to kiss your hair, I won’t be bored to repeat our first kiss, and I won’t be bored to once again taste the lingering taste of the toothpaste on your ravishing lips.

How could I get bored of experiencing something so goddamn beautiful over, and over, and over, and over again?

As I’m writing this post, I’m currently at the 26th floor.
I’m looking outside the window, and I could feel the cold rainy night.
And I could see the city lights below me.
And I.. I quietly whispered a wish, to God? To Universe? I don’t really know who do I need to speak my wish to.

But I wish, I wish both of us could once again drown in Love without caring about anything else in this wicked, crumbling world; just me, you, and us.
Together in Love.

Should I plead and beg the God or the Universe to help you find your way back?
God? Universe? Please?

I need you to find your way back home, where you left your love – inside my heart.

 
Love,
Yours.

V.A.C.W.

 


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